Field Trip
by Konichiwa Kitty
Summary: Aizen decided that since he was going to take over the world as we knew it, he should teach his "loyal" Arrancar about the world a bit before he destroyed it, to help them in their conquest. Therefore, he devised a plan for a field trip to the human world... So what happens on their field trip? Why is there Hetalia in this so obviously Bleach fanfiction? Do you really want to know?
1. Egypt to Australia

Aizen had decided that since he was going to take over the world as we knew it, he should teach his loyal soldiers about he world a bit before it was destroyed, so as to help them in their conquest. Therefore, he devised a plan for a field trip to the human world. The trip was mandatory for all the Espada.

After much planning, packing and protesting each others insolence, they finally set off. (Wonderweiss wasn't allowed to come along, so Tousen stayed behind to look after him.) Gin and Aizen took the lead, opening a massive Garganta out of Hueco Mundo and into an unoccupied desert area. They'd already dressed the right way, and when they emerged from the sand dunes, they looked like a group of hot, thirsty tourists who'd gotten lost and were looking for a place to stay.

Once they got to a town, they found out that the Garganta had led them to Egypt. Aizen felt this was a good start, and took them to visit the Pyramids of Giza and the Sphinx, hiring a tour guide with his endless money to tell them about it. Once they were done, Aizen did his best to civilly thank the tour guide, and they set off at a quick pace to Cairo, leaving the tour guide smiling happily as he held the enormous lump of pure gold Aizen had given him as payment. By the time they reached Cairo, it was late afternoon and they had to find an inn to rest and refresh. Aizen chose a medium inn, not too luxurious but not too shabby, and payed with another lump of gold. The Espada settled down in their respective rooms, and all was peaceful in the night except for the occasional grunt of a camel or call of a jackal.

However, word had spread on the street of how rich Aizen was, and several thieves unwisely chose to try and burglar him. Suffice to say, none of them returned without a serious injury (oh dear).

The next morning, Aizen decided they'd spent enough time in Egypt, and hired a camel caravan to carry them to the border of Israel. They rode swiftly, pausing only a few times at an oasis or two, and once at the Nile to "admire" the crocodiles. They reached Israel in 5 days, and paid the caravan driver enough money for him to go into retirement for the rest of his life. Once the caravan had gone far enough, the Espadas air-walked across Israel, pausing at Jerusalem to take in the sights of the thousands of people praying around a black box, Aizen's face wrinkled in scorn (he's not big on religion, unless he's the god). They walked on to the Ganges River in India, and visited the fabled tree where the Buddha had found enlightenment. They went down to visit the Indian Ocean, and had a nice day at the beach. Aizen then rented a boat for then to cross the ocean. Starrk and Barragan hated it, as they were seasick all the way. They landed in the Phillipines, where a week was spent just relaxing in comfort. All the Espada were rather badly bitten by bugs except for Szayel, he had his patented bugspray garuanteed to keep away all the bugs he wanted! When that week was over, they all bought airline tickets to Sydney, Australia. But when they got off into the airport and Aizen counted heads, he realized someone was missing. With a jolt, he realized who.

"We've left Gin behind in the Phillipines! And I forgot to give him the money he'd asked for, so he doesn't have any money!" The Espada glared at him accusingly, at least some of them did; they didn't really care for Gin (poor Gin). "WHAT HAVE I DONE?"

Meanwhile, Gin was sitting aboard a first-class plane to Hong Kong. He grinned evilly. "It always pays to steal!"

* * *

And why was Tousen not included in this trip? Actually, I just don't like him very much ._. He scares me. (Wonderweiss is good though :D)

Bleach is belongs to our King of Trolls, Tite Kubo!


	2. Hong Kong to Portugal

After having left Gin behind in the Phillipines, Aizen was frantic with worry. But the Espada assured him Gin could take care of himself, and there was no point in worrying. With this in mind, they went on a 2-week nature voyage in the wilds of Australia. It went by quickly and painfully, with Aaroniero getting severe burns trying to roast a can of beans, Halibel almost drowning them trying to put a bush fire out, Grimmjow breaking an arm after getting kicked by a kangaroo ("what in Aizen's Left Eye are these things?"), and Ilforte nearly being decapitated and eaten by a pack of wild dingoes.

As Aizen tried to figure out where to go next, all the females begged to go to Hong Kong. "Things to buy! Things to look at! Great learning experience for crowded city-places!" It was the last one that swayed Aizen. They boarded a plane to Hong Kong. When they arrived, everyone stared around with googly eyes, soaking in the sights. Grimmjow wanted to get a tattoo, but Halibel wanted to shop for some more clothing. The males (including Aizen) went off to search for a tattoo parlor while the girls visited all the malls, agreeing to meet back at the airport in 2 day's time. They had a fun time shopping. However, there was a more interesting thing in store for the males...

They'd finally found a suitable tattoo parlor. The sign said Newly Opened, the name was the Silver Knight Tattoo Parlor, and everything looked neat and clean. Imagine their surprise when, in going in, they found none other than Ichimaru Gin sitting behind the counter polishing needles, the exact same Gin they'd left in the Phillipines! After a warm reunion, Gin used one of Szayel's clones, let the clone to continue running the tattoo parlor, and rejoined the Espada. In two days time, they met up back at the airport (Halibel, Apacci, Mila Rose and Sung-Sun with several bags on clothes, Grimmjow and others with new tattoos), and decided to skip Russia and Japan and go immediately to Italy to eat their famous pasta.

When they disembarked, there was a strange young man standing on a street corner who called himself Italy and sold the most delicious pasta the Espada had ever tasted. To top it off, "Italy" also sold chocolate cake, yum! They then visited France after a night spent in one of the richer hotels. As they took off to meet the bladder needs of several of the Espada, there was a strange man wearing fancy clothes who was called "France" sitting in an alleyway and playing a violin, accompanied by an "Austria" who played piano.

"Aizen-sama, do all the people in this "Europe" name the selves after one of the countries?" Ulquiorra asked. Aizen just shrugged. Ulquiorra shook his head, pondering the possibilities.

After one too many bon-bons eaten, the Espada began arguing about where to go next. After a multitude of arm wrestling and some fistfights, it was decided that next up was Portugal. After traveling a bit by train (new experience!), they arrived at Lisbon, the capital. Again there was one of those people called after their country. This one had brown hair in a short ponytail, writing poems and occasionally strumming on something that looked like a ukelele. Ulquiorra shook his head in bewilderment; why these people were named after their country and seemed to represent its most stereotyped attributes, he had no explanation. He would just have to accept it and move on...

* * *

Aizen is so rich... *sobbing* But then, he plans for everything. _Everything. _

Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya...


	3. England to Mexico

Sadly, the Espada didn't find Portugal very exciting. Most of them wanted to go see the famous "Queen Elizabeth II" of England (Aizen learned his lesson: don't tell the Espada your future plans, because they'll completely forget the place they're in and want to go to the next place.) They booked a plane to England. The minute they got there, they were off, with Aizen unable to stop any of them. Even Gin secretly walked off and got a job at a tattoo parlor (obsession much?), leaving Aizen forever alone. It took a whole week to gather them back together, in which the female Espada and Arrancars bought 8 bags while shopping, the males bought 20 pounds worth of chocolate and beer, Gin received $82.37 working at the tattoo parlor, Barragan went into a nursing home, and Grimmjow, Yammi and Starrk joined a motorcycle gang. Aizen was furious, and immediately they set out for the Arctic, where they spent a week in isolation, hunting caribou to survive (Starrk's Los Lobos made this rather easy). When Aizen felt like they'd had enough, they went across to Canada, where they were just in time for Mardi Gras celebrations. The Espada fit in perfectly in the parades, and once the festivities were over they crossed the border into the US. They were shocked at the amount of overweight people walking the streets, but Yammi just knew that this was the country for him. They had a few meals at Burger King and T.G. . Ulquiorra was amazed at the amount of burgers he saw one man eat once, and when he went over to ask the person's name they replied with "America." Ulquiorra immediately backed away and didn't look up from his soda through the rest of the meal. They then rushed into Mexico, which wasn't much better. Here people were on the other extreme, starving and hungry. Aizen felt that his Espada didn't need to learn about poverty since there wouldn't be any once he took over the world, so they quickly traveled by train through Mexico into Peru.

* * *

Sorry Mexico...(and Ulquiorra, for confusing him so much xD)  
Such unruly little Arrancars, tsk tsk!


	4. Peru to Japan, aka Going Home

Once entering Peru, Aizen immediately signed up for a trip around the continent of South America. They visited the Nazca Lines (which creeped Nnoitra out big-time), the capitals of all the countries, took a trip through the rain forest and fished for piranhas in the Amazon River, where Halibel spoke with (and ate) the fishies and Yammi was chased by locals for the "accidental" devouring of several trees...

Aizen felt that their trip was over by that point, but almost all of them wanted to visit Antarctica, Russia and Japan before they left. Finally Aizen relented, and they rode a tiny steamboat to the edges of Antarctica, where they had to wait two weeks before another one came along. Halibel and Szayel were happy; Halibel got to have leopard seal buffet almost every day (poor seals), and Szayel completed several experiments he'd been wanting to test. The others sat miserably in the freezing cold watching penguins do...unspeakable things. By the time the boat came again even Halibel was tired, and they took the first plane to Russia. On the way, there was an incident in which Apacci nearly starved because the airline wouldn't stop serving sausages and she only ate vegetables, being a deer and all. Sun-Sun and Mila Rose teased her the whole time in Russia, where they were attacked by the Mafia after "accidentally-on-purpose" destroying one of their buildings and finding out that polar bears prefer Espada over normal people. But they somehow escaped Russia, and made it all the way back to Japan again. Right before Aizen opened the Garganta, they discovered that Grimmjow was missing. After a frantic search for the Sexta Espada, Grimmjow showed up with a state-of-the-art Honda motorcycle. It was a hard-won battle for him to keep the motorcycle against Aizen , but Grimmjow finally won (go Grimmjow!) and they set out for home. Upon arrival, they discovered that Las Noches had been stolen somehow, with only the great hall where Aizen's Throne once sat, and Szayel's labs. Aaroniero was so frustrated for some reason that he accidentally broke the lava lamp case that was holding his heads and a quick revival had to be done, where they put his heads in a spare beaker found in Szayel's labs and filled it with lemon juice. Aaroniero never forgave them for that incident even though it wasn't their fault, and proceeded to replace all the other Espadas' tea with lemon juice for the next month.

Ah, home sweet home...or what was left of it.

* * *

**Finally. Finished. It took way longer than necessary to put this final chapter up here. Thanks for reading!**


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